Goals, Personal development

Productive resting

Having freedom is dangerous. What if you never do anything actually good for you and your health, whether it is mental or physical? What if when you make your choices you don’t think about how they will affect you in a couple of years?

I am a lazy person. I could easily just veg out and watch YouTube for my whole life. How ever I try really hard not to do that, so what can I or us do that will make us feel rested but still not be a total waste of time.

I want to put a disclaimer here because I am sure someone is feeling very threatened that someone dares to tell them not to watch YouTube. You can do it. Just keep your head in the game and don’t over do it.

If you would die today. Would you feel like you had a fulfilled life? Would you feel like you did all that you could to achieve goals? Did you get anything done from your bucket list? No? Me neither.

So here are some ideas for you to start resting productively, letssaaa go 😉


Photo by Sidney M. on Unsplash
  • Make a bucket list of things you want to try. This can be an event you want to participate in, a habit you want to try, anything. I will next list out ideas that could go into your bucket list.
  • Date night; this can be with you and your partner, you and yourself or maybe you and your friends. Whom ever you will share this time with, try to plan. Don’t make it too simple like; Veg out and watch YouTube. That is what we want to avoid doing. Maybe plan an outing or a game night. Of if you are doing a date night alone, plan a pamper routine. Read a book you have put aside for “when I have time”…. yeah the time is this date night 😉
  • Travel to a destination that you want to visit. This could be near or far away, what ever suits your life right now. If you can’t afford to go on a road trip on your own, how about you save up for a while and ask your friends/partner join you. This way you will be able to have more money and not be alone. However there is nothing wrong with going on your own. It might just be a bit of a longer time that you have to save, depending where you want to go. Plan it out.
  • Meditate
  • Watch a Skillshare video that will teach you something and actually implement it: Skillshare To try out click here and get a 2 months free try out. (I am not sponsored at all I will however get one month free for everyone who becomes a premium member after the 2 months are up)

Photo by JESHOOTS.COM on Unsplash
  • Watch a documentary. And don’t be passive about it. Write up notes as you watch. Check out some details after. It might never do anything for you or one day you might impress your potential boss by knowing about something that they wouldn’t have expected you to have know. (You can obviously do for the sake of curiosity as well)
  • Practice a skill. It might be doing a handstand, maybe a Yoga pose. What ever it is. Just use a couple of hours to work on that skill. Who knows it might become your thing 😉
  • I kind of already mentioned this but read. Read read read. It makes you rest from what ever you have to do. But it is still keeping your brain active. If you read a non fiction book you can learn and maybe implement new ideas. But even with a fiction book, you will get a lot of benefits. Making up a world in your head and escaping the reality can do great things for your health and creativity in your own projects. I personally at least feel like I am a lot more rested after reading a fiction book than just staring at the screen for ages.
  • Go for a walk. Yes it is that simple
  • Figure yourself out. Journal, have a journal prompt. Figure out anything you can about you. Isn’t it weird sometimes that we know a friend better than we know ourselves? I mean why can we give advice to a friend but when it comes to ourselves we are clueless? Well…. maybe after journaling and figuring things out, you can give advice to yourself
  • In case my ideas didn’t show case my point I shall write it here in a more clear way. When I am mentioning productive resting I mean getting our mind of work/studies or what ever else is stressing you out, and giving it a break, while not shutting it totally off. Shutting off is sometimes a good thing. But when it becomes a method to procrastinate, or to veg out totally, it becomes unhealthy. And while I am sure that the ideas I mentioned in this post are something you can still over do, but most of the time the risk is smaller than with say Instagram, YouTube or other social media.

If you want some ideas for challenges you could do or things to put on bucket lists check out the Goal Guys on YouTube (no the irony isn’t lost on me) Goal Guys My favourite video from them right now is this : I tried to go 7 Days Without Procrastination One of the reasons why I love them is because they inspire you to gamefy your goals and try new things without huge commitment fear 😉

Also here is a link to my bucket list on Pinterest: Bucket list Pinterest

Thanks for reading and hope to hear from you in the comments. What should I write about next? What are your bucket list items?

Xoxo, Changed Life

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Health, Personal development

Phone addiction; why is it bad?

Today we use our phones a stupid amount. According to Business Insider, we check our phones up to 2, 617 times a day. And that is our “normal use” if you are a heavy user then that number rises up to 5, 400 times. That means you touch it about 180 times an hour if you are using it within a time period of 12 hours. (As a normal user). And that sounds to me that it’s a huge issue. And I don’t think that it sounds like a healthy amount at all.

Full article here: Business Insider

Photo by Paul Hanaoka on Unsplash

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Time is ticking and your thumbs are just tapping Photo by Paul Hanaoka on Unsplash

The List has interviewed a couple of doctors about the negative effects that the overuse of our device can lead to.  And to be honest not one of the symptoms is something I haven’t to an extent or another noticed in myself.

  1. Eye strain is a common issue for me. It is also something that Dr. Howard Purcell explains to Adria Valdes Greenhauff, the writer of the article “What really happens when you stare at your phone all day”. The eyes have 6 muscles that control its use and one of them is in charge of focusing the eyes. If you don’t let your eyes rest from focusing it will eventually grow tired. Ever had red, itchy and achy eyes? Maybe even a full blast headache? Yeah me too.
  2. We have a lot of overuse injuries as well, Dr. Jennifer Stagg talks about the strain using your phone causes to your neck. Even an inch of a head drop can lead to double the load on the muscles. Using your phone can lead to wrist and thumb issues as well according to Dr. Stagg.
  3. Using the phone all the time can lead to lower oxygen levels. As if all of the other issues wasn’t enough. If you have trouble sleeping you might as well first check how much you use your phone (especially during the evening)
  4. A couple of next issues are ones that scare/bother me the most. Using the phone a lot can lead to self- inflicted anxiety, depression, concentration issues, and even hallucinations. Now I can attest to almost all of them. Depression not so much all of the other ones yes. The anxiety of missing out something important if I don’t check my phone. Not being able to concentrate on something for a long time because I am so used to see something new every 5 seconds (because I mean Instagram… scroll, scroll, scroll. Oh did the 5 hours already pass, shit?!) Have you sworn you heard a *bling* from getting a message, but you swore that your phone was silent? Yeah, it is silent. That bling you hear is in your head it is almost like wishful thinking because your brain wants you to check your phone again.

If you want to read the article in full please visit: TheList

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I have so many friends why am I so alone and depressed I wonder? Photo by NordWood Themes on Unsplash

The thing is that no matter how much you try to tell yourself that you don’t use your phone too much. You probably do. And I know it is very hard to not use your phone because everyone else does it too but trust me it would be beneficial.

Even if  I have a semi-full day of school or work I somehow have been able to use my phone up to 5.5 hours. That is 1/3 of the time I am awake (about). In that amount of time, I could study my skills in Spanish or use it to research business stuff or an essay or… I am sure you get my point. I could manage about a billion things in 5+ hours but I use it to scroll the phone. Hmmm, where did the time go? I wonder…

But seriously what will it take to realize that no matter how imminent digitalization is, we don’t have to give it all the power. We can form boundaries. Because I don’t think that we have the capacity to deal with millions of people with concentration issues or who are depressed, anxious and having hallucinations.

 

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I swear I got a notification… hmmm Photo by rawpixel on Unsplash

I wonder if we would spend only 30 minutes a day on the phone how much time would be freed for the things “we don’t have time for”

Thank you for reading! Let me know down in the comments below what you think!

– Alisa

 

Goals, Lessons in life, Personal development

5 Ways to combat laziness

Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired

-Jules Renard

1st some science: Science shows that there are people who are more likely to be lazy and those who are less likely and it is a lot to do with our genes. So there is such a thing as “couch potato gene”. Essentially what it does makes us have fewer dopamine receptors, that means that we aren’t going to be awarded as easily for the activities we do by our brains. (And while this is usually related with sports, it is just as accurate with other daily tasks) And really we don’t have many idiots who do things without awards. So when does this become a problem?

Video by AsapSCIENCE https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gd7wAithl7Ii

When is laziness a problem? 

It becomes a problem when instead of living your life you just exist. At least for me, that is an issue. I have realized that I am bored with life. I just go through the motions. I go to school see my friends once in a while and other than that I just watch YouTube. Don’t get me wrong. Having a pause and go through social media is great, sometimes. It can’t be your life. And really, you watching dog videos or insta pics is something that makes our brains even lazier. Why should you do anything when you get a dopamine hit right from the comfort of your bed. And this is how the vicious cycle starts. So what to do?

What are my 5 tips?

  1. Force yourself to do more things. Put yourself into projects and situations from which you can’t back out of easily. I am doing to projects now where there is quite a bit on my shoulders and me backing out of them would just seem pathetic. Of course, if it would be a life or death thing, it’d be different. I wouldn’t go there if I’d be in a car crash. BUT I am not comfortable just letting them hear an excuse, you know?
  2. This is related to the last tip but: Add things to your calendar so you just don’t have time to lazy around for 5 hours. Look it’s easier to be lazy when you have only like 4 lessons a week and you seem to have so much free time. But what if you work, have a couple of extra projects and then also some of your own goals? This is not to say that you should work yourself to death. But when you don’t have too much extra time you are forced to organize your time. There is no; “I’ll do this later” because you literally don’t have any time later. Or you don’t want to risk it in case of something coming up. And I mean I am sure all of us also want to see our friends right?
  3. Do not sleep in. I know half of you hate me right now because you love to sleep and the other half because you have heard this so many times. But at least for me if I sleep more than 7 -8 hours I feel very sluggish. And sometimes it’s fine. But if you want to stop being lazy becoming sluggish and having a heavy head is not doing you any favors. Most people are at their best when they sleep 6 to 8 hours (depends on your age) and this is something I have found to be true.
  4. If you, however, sleep in, start your day slow, that doesn’t mean all your hope is gone and you have an excuse to be lazy all day. (Sorry old me and anyone who uses this as an excuse) Look just this weekend both days I slept in. I gave myself permission, to be honest, because I have been a bit sick and don’t want to make it worse and after sleeping in I got this sluggish feeling like I often do. Saturday I only started working after 4pm. I went for a walk before that and took a cool shower to wake me up. Then I just got paper and wrote the things that are on the top of my head (those things usually are the ones that bother you the most thus very likely to be a high priority) I didn’t do all on that list but I can honestly say I was productive for at least 4 hours. And that is way more than nothing  I could have done because I didn’t wake up at 5 like I would have liked to)
  5. If you don’t do the little things don’t expect yourself to have the energy to do the big things. If you are too lazy to brush your teeth, wash your face, make your bed, get dressed properly; why the f*** would you have the energy to finish a project or go for a run? All the small things count. You give yourself momentum when you finish the small tasks. And if you start your day by choosing that those things aren’t important why would anything else be? Just be a smelly blob for a day and wonder why you can’t make yourself do anything… I’ve been there and done that and you know what. It isn’t a very positive space to be in. This is why so many highly efficient people are obsessed with routines. If they can finish up a good routine be it in the morning, gym or evening. It builds momentum for the day or the next day.

Bonus tip:  Do not burn yourself up. I don’t want you to faint one day and say it was because I told you to keep yourself so busy you can’t ever be lazy, because that is not my goal at all. Quite frankly once I have perfected my calendar I want to cross out Sunday totally and make it just a funday. It doesn’t matter if it’s for friends or for me to just be in bed and watch a movie. The main point is just for it to be free for whatever I want it to be. Also, this isn’t the only day you have a right to be lazy or to have fun. If your steps for your goals have been met on a Monday by say 4pm you have a right to go out with friends or whatever you want. Don’t have to form an army routine. BUT at first, an army routine might be helpful so that the “couch potato gene” doesn’t get you.

Thanks for reading and good luck with battling laziness!

More posts by me: 

5 things I’ve learned while trying to change my life

Stars sentenced to death

-Alisa

Lessons in life, Personal development

Why can’t you find happiness?

There are obviously so many different things that make us unhappy in life. But I think that the biggest reason, honestly is that we define happiness in a fundamentally wrong way.

Let’s make a very very clear point here: Happiness is NOT the total 100% rainbow and unicorn existence with rainbows and sprinkles! The only way you will achieve that kind of happiness is by using drugs and even then it won’t last forever and if you try to make it last forever you will die of an overdose (that is not today’s topic though)

So how does this relate anything to the reason why we can’t find the happiness you may ask? Very simply put, I think people say I am not happy, and I want to find happiness because they don’t realize that they will never be happy all the time. I am not talking for all people here of course. My point is probably best described by Jay Shetty. He is a rebel turned monk, turned influencer and you should really check him out. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GXoErccq0vw)

What he has said is that we should look at life from the perspective of a  lifeline. If your life is going up and down it means that your heart is beating, the only way you can have a constant happiness (or sadness) is when you have a flat line. Essentially that means that you are dead. In the interview, I linked this is explained at about 16min 22s.

My point is that we don’t want to accept that we will never be constantly happy. It is normal to feel sad once in a while. Anger as well. This is one of the reasons I like the French language. There are 2 different words to use for the English word happy. Meaning different things…

Joyeux means happy. You would say it to a person having a birthday party (Joyeux Anniversaire) but heureuse, that is beyond happiness. It is being contented. It would be something someone would say about getting married to the love of their life or giving birth to a child. It isn’t as if the marriage never has any issues or that raising a kid will always be fun. But is about the feeling of contentment and peace that you know you wouldn’t have it any other way.  (Obviously, these things can be achieved by more than just having kids or getting married they are just the most common examples I can come up with. )

So think beyond just the bursts of feelings you have on the daily basis. If you aren’t laughing all the time doesn’t mean you aren’t heureuse. But if you all the time feel like nothing matters, nothing brings joy then you can safely say you aren’t happy(heureuse)  and you should search for answers. But on avergage, I think that we just assume life is supposed to be easy, and we are supposed to laugh and never have a shitty day at work. And that is just not the case.

As always I thank you for reading. I hope you found the post interesting and helpful and I would love to have a conversation about this in the comment section below.

xoxo

-Alisa

 

 

 

Lessons in life

What should I do?

Endless questions day in and day out.  Should I travel to Thailand for a much needed stress free vacation? Should I go on that date? Do I even like this job? And so on and so on. I am sure you catch my train of thought. Well, what are you supposed to do when your mind is going 100 miles an hour and your body is stuck? There  was a great post on Psychology Today on this topic, and I will add some of my own ideas to it.

  1. Think of how you want to feel.  Sometimes a job seems like too true to be true but there is just this voice at the back of your head that is like: ” Ummmmm I am not so sure this is a good idea.” Don’t disregard that voice. Think about how you want to feel if you take that job. Is it that you want to feel like you are financial stable? Or is it that you want to feel like you job has purpose? If the job environment seems shit and you know you will lose your will to loose? Well no amount of money, is going to make you feel happy doing that job. (Do remember that no job is always fun. Sometimes sacrifices have to be made)
  2. What do you value the most? Look everyone has different ideas of what is fun and great. You might be ok working just for money because your side hustle keeps your soul happy.  And just because your parents or friends would like something doesn’t mean you have to.
  3. #Just do itLame, yes but yet so very true. I swear to you, not making a choice and being in this limbo of to do or not to do, is so much worse than a wrong choice. You have to accept this fact, that you do not always make the right choice. And that is okay. Look if you do the wrong choice, next time you will know better. At least with a wrong decision you have a change of taking an action to damage control. If you do nothing, you will notice that in the end, you have sailed with the current somewhere far far away from where you want to be. A wrong decision might be a step back, but it doesn’t stop you from taking steps forward after.
  4. Talk it out…notice it says OUT. Look yes you have a lot of thoughts and yes you may want to think everything through and think about all the options from A to Z… the thing is, most of the time if you just talk and talk and talk about the same issue with the people you ask advice from…. well it is because you want them to give the advice you want to hear. That way you don’t have to take the responsibility for what you are doing. And I am hear to give you a reality check (also known as a figurative bitch slap). No matter what someone tells you to do, it is YOU who makes the choice and thus it is YOU who is fully the blame. (Unless someone holds you at gun point, but that is black mail, and that’s just something totally different)
  5. Sleep on it and then trust your gut. Just because something looks good on paper doesn’t meen that it is actually good. Research everything and figure out if what the paper says is actually true. After sleeping on it, with all the information you have how does this thing feel? Does it feel right? Is it something you want to do? If yes go for it. If no, say no. But do not be a “no man” just because you are scared. Learn to differentiate between fear that is just because of your limiting believes and fear that is so crippling that, you know, if you do what you are thinking of doing will kill you.

Action is the best way to figure things out. It doesn’t matter if it is about a life path, job, family  or choices that are smaller. It is rare that people do such huge mistakes that they can’t turn their life around later on. I for one rather go to the wrong direction than just stay always where I am and wither like a plant after a while.

Hope you liked this post and please don’t hesitate to comment, it’d be much appreciated.

-Alisa

Personal development

Make a decision and stick to it

I know what you are thinking. Thanks Alisa, that helped a lot. I sure as hell didn’t think you could have said anything more basic. And to that I will say, chill my friend. Just stick along and for what I have to say.

I am currently reading a book by Anthony Robbins; The Giant Within. Technically I am listening to it but you get my point. I am just starting up, but I am now in the part where he speaks about making decisions and how the choices we make can impact our whole life. But he makes a distinction between just a choice to see how things go and making a conscious decision to work for something. He goes as far as to state and we are so un used to making decisions we get lazy with it. That is why making a difficult important decision is so hard. And this got me thinking, how long I have lived my life in a way of just letting the current take me where it wants to.

What is Robbins idea for making our decision making muscle grow? Practice of course. Start making small decisions and sticking with them. You can do a big and a small decision just to see how it feels. And practice until you making a life changing decision won’t seem like “Oh well, but I wouldn’t be able to do that anyway.” Hell yeah you can, if you chose to do it.

I haven’t gotten further in the book, but I assume that Tony will talk about this at some point. I will still mention this as a thought. It isn’t enough to decide that I want thing A or I want to reach a million followers or what ever it is that your goal is. I would assume that a real decision requires action. You decide to do everything in your power to reach that goal, that idea, that step in your life.

How would this look in practice? I would think that not only do you decide what you want to do you make decisions on how to make it work and take action. Let’s try to see with an example shall we.  Let’s say you want to be a business owner:

  1. Decide what business you would want to own. Personal Development? Helping people find their missing relatives? What ever it is, just chose that.
  2. Decide to research the crap out of that topic. What type a business should it be. How much money to invest. How to market this project.
  3. Decide and make a email list, to whom you tell about this opportunity. (Beneficial if they are your targeted audience.
  4. Decide to invest, and do it.
  5. Start making daily decisions that make it possible to work on your business. If you are broke and investing right away isn’t a choice, make a decision to find a job to help pay for your dreams.
  6. Baby steps, even small decisions can have a big impact.

As always thank you for reading. If you have read the book please let me know what you thought  and if you want to read the book or listen to it you can find it online 🙂

-Alisa

Goals, Personal development

Time management and success +rambling

I will be the first the first to admit. That even thought I am interested a lot in personal development and searching for myself and all that. I have not yet mastered the art of being a good time manager and a successful student. Do not get me wrong, you don’t have to be an A+ student or 4,0 GPA student to be successful, but since my main “job” right now is studying, I would regard getting good grades to be one of the ways I would feel successful.

I, like many others am lazy, and I do not think with a broader vision for the future. Now don’t go clicking away. I swear I am working on it. And this post isn’t me laughing and saying oh but I am just lazy, what ever. This post is more to tell people that if they feel they aren’t on top of things, like everyone seems to be. Not to worry, cos they aren’t alone. And while I am not best at this, I do have tips up my sleeve. (Reminder: Only hard work will pay of, there is no secret formula)

  1. Know thyself. Look I will admit that there are issues like dyslexia and concentration issues and what not, but in the end appart for those, really it is just us. 5 different tabs open on your computer? Are you sure all of them are work related? Phone isn’t on silent because mom will call any minute? So if you don’t answer within an hour she will not let you live it down? You are writing an essay but you just have to answer that friend who is asking if she should wear the pink shirt or the white one, and now you must save her from eternal embarrassment. (Pink duh!) My point is, when you study/ work or anything else if you seem to be lacking time, analyse where it is going and if it really is out of our hands.
  2. Figure out when and how. When are you the most productive? For me it is around 9am–> (that is if I wake up at 6 as usually). For you it could really be in the evening. I don’t really care. Not in the rude way. But you work best when you work best. Any time is a good time to work, if you do it well. I do not believe that the only way to succeed is to be an early bird. The only way to succeed is to work your ass off.
  3. Calendar, organization and a system that works.  And here I am again admitting that I am giving advice that I don’t use 100% myself. I suck at prioritizing and when I organize things it usually lasts for a day or two. But it does help. Clear desk clear mind and all that really does work for me. I do clean up my space quite often. And when I do, I work 10 times better.
  4. Set realistic goals. My boyfriend, if he’d read this would laugh. I always make my goals too big or I have too many of them. Ever had a list of goals (or to-do’s) that looks a bit like this:
    1.  Wake up a 6  go for a 5km run. Eat something very healthy. Ab workout.
    2. Drink 3 L of water
    3. Re organize your whole room/house
    4. Dominate the world
    5. Read 8 books (Not a good to-do/goal list)
  5. Forgive yourself if you do not work as hard that day as what you wanted to. You won’t achieve anything by beating yourself over it. Trust me I know.
  6. Concentrate on doing the best you can. If you only reading one subject is the best you can for today. Then that is great at least you read that chapter. The important part is not to do anything at all. (Check out the Non-Zero method) Get better bit by bit. You will not become a superhero over night (Unless a radioactive spider bites you or some ish)

Being a hard worker and succeeding with what ever you do in life is a lifestyle. You have to learn to become a hard worker/good student/business woman/man etc. It takes hard work, especially if you have never been a hard worker/ inspired person before. You brain works in a loop of habits. You have to change the bad ones and that takes time and effort. But don’t give up. I know I won’t.

 

 

Personal development

How to overcome overwhelm (or not get there at all)

Here we are again. The fall is upon us and the real life slaps us in the face an angry ex. The summer was so fun, but now we are back to the reality of everything. School started, or a new project at work. On top of that you have to do a billion of other things. Go to yoga, update blog, and with work or school (or worse yet both) you have more than just one obligation. And now you wake up at night with a feeling of a constrictor cobra squeezing your insides. Yay!

But what if we don’t have to feel overwhelmed? How to make sure, that you can enjoy almost every-single task you do, and not feel like it is sucking out the juices of life from within your soul?

First make sure you know that this isn’t something more serious like a burnout. If your overwhelm has already jumped over the edge and became a burnout I would highly suggest you check out my post about relaxing, why we should and how to do it. The link is here: https://changedlife365.net/2017/06/03/how-to-relax-and-why/

Now to the topic at hand

  1. Figure out why are you feeling like all the walls are falling on you? List all of the things you are “supposed” to do. Now from that list see if there is anything you can disregard. Do not take tasks on your plate that will make your energy bank get depleted. If you have extra things you just can’t do, then make sure you organize it so that you don’t offend anyone. If it is already promised, make a mental note not to promise things that make you feel like shit. As a side note, do not take away those things that bring you happiness in the long run or are there for your health. So, I think yoga should stay. But proofreading your friends essay for the next day, when you still have to write yours… well that can go.
  2. Now that your list looks more realistic. (Hopefully) figure out what the task monster is. A task monster is one task that seems so big and time consuming you feel like someone punched you in the gut right after reading that task. Now think of ways to make it smaller; more manageable. Make an action plan. All the tasks that are bigger than just 15 minutes of work, can be made into bite sized prices. You don’t eat a full pizza in one bite, so why should you do a huge project/essay that way?
  3. Make sure you haven’t got too much to do on one day. Make a to-do list that you know you can complete. Prioritize. If you have an essay in two days and a project in three weeks you could still work on both but definitely the essay is a priority. Even if the project is supper important. I think a smart to-do list would be: Finnish essay, do project for 30 minutes, activity you like. Or something similar.
  4. Do not do everything in one sitting. No matter who you are, people don’t concentrate well for more than 45 minutes and several studies show that even less. So don’t just sit on your butt for hours on end. Take pauses. But make them count. I can make a post about this later in detail. But if you sit in the same space with the same computer and that vacant look in your eyes, after your pause you won’t feel rejuvenated. Do anything at all but not computer or phone. Make that pause count. Stretch, meditate, visualize your dream life.
  5. Do not beat yourself over things not always being 100% perfect. Chances are that they never are. You can get an A+ on a paper and still have a couple comma mistakes. It isn’t the end. Done is better than perfect. And with every mistake you learn. So don’t beat yourself up. Make sure that every task you do is the  best that you can give at the moment, and then be proud you completed it.
  6. After you have finished the things you had time for that day. Stop. Do not do an all nighter. Do not sit for hours just to get that list less long. You will hate yourself next day and feel more overwhelmed. Make sure your evening has some time for yourself. Take a long shower. Read a book you love. Re-charge for tomorrow. You may wake up a bit earlier if you feel you need the extra time. But do not forget to take care of yourself. Sleep and food and exercise, meditation all of that is like fuel to a car. You can’t disregard it no matter how you have to get from place A to B.
  7. In order to not get overwhelmed or god forbid burnout, have one day a week with at least one afternoon just for you. It can be going out with friends. Reading a book. Making a bath. Going for a longer relaxed gym session (not the squat and go type) doing your nails or anything that will make you feel like yourself.
  8. I think this might be the most important. Do not let your negativity and self pity take you to the path of inflating the issue to be more big than it is. You can’t just not do the things you are obligated to do. So just sitting and crying for days over how unlucky you are and how life isn’t fair won’t help. I mean crying a bit can be helpful, to let out the feeling of frustration but then you have to wipe your face and get to business. No one else will do your work for you. So remember to make your health a priority but do not make it an excuse why you can’t do things.

I just had this feeling of overwhelm and just self pity to be honest. Felt like no matter what I did I was banging my head against the wall. That is why I wrote this post. I hope it helped and I hope everyone will feel energized and productive this fall.

A lot of inspiration for this post I got from this video, it is great, check it out! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JDixLnjgRrw

As always, thanks for reading

-Alisa

Goals

Goal Planning

I have a post here for you my friends that I am going to myself fill up with my goals, wishes and vision for the time periods marked below. Why you ask? Quite simply I have TOO MANY goals for a short time period. It has been proven by multiple studies that too many goals will actually hinder your progress. That is why, I plan on dividing my goals from short term to longer term to long as term goals. I want to see what I want to achieve in my life and most importantly track my progress as I go further and further into my life.

(from other blog)
8) Having too many goals.

Some people have too many goals and not enough focus. It’s like they’re standing in front of a dart board with three targets in mind. Hitting just one target is difficult enough; hitting three targets simultaneously with one dart is impossible. Therefore, determine the one goal you are focused on and move forward with that one goal only. Eliminate other goals that are secondary. This is not to say that you should never have more than one goal. Rather, you need to realize that you have only so much time and energy. Therefore, choose the goal that will give you the highest ROE (return on effort) and focus on that one goal first. Once complete, you can then focus on other goals in sequence.” (Link to the full post http://www.reliableplant.com/Read/8259/fail-achieve-goals)

My example plan for goal setting
Goals for next 6 months

  • Wake up earlier; 6 am
  • Maintain healthier diet
  • Being grateful
  • Meditating daily

Goals for the next year

  • Be able to run 5km without stopping (about 3.1 miles)
  • Learn to get out of your comfort zone

Goals for the next 3 years

  • Finish the book you are writing
  • Get back on track with playing flute
  • become an independent blogger

Goals for the next 5 years

  • Start writing your selfhelp guide
  • Learn 3 new languages till at least mediocre level
  • Own a business

Goals/Vision for the next 10 years

  • Own your own home
  • Own your dream car
  • Be able to sustain a comfortable life with traveling

I have stated some examples in this blog post that may or may not be my actual goals just to show an example what I regard as a long process goals (those require more time and patience) and what I regard as short term goals (these obviously are supposed to be easier to achieve).

This may look totally different for you. You might have smaller goals than my example or larger goals, that is totally up to you. Disclaimer: I would also like to remind that these examples will be broad and thus you should work on making yours as specific as possible, or making specific action plans for each goal.

Remember you do not have to have many goals written down, and chances are they might change or you might add new goals to your list in the future. This is normal and perfectly ok. I would hate to be a slave to my goals even if reaching them is super important for your overall well being. But say one of your goals is to travel to Mexico next year summer but right when you plan on going there, your friend is getting married in Australia and she wants you to be her bridesmaid, what is more important then? Surely then you would use your savings to travel to see her? Life is never so clear cut that you could possibly take into consideration everything. The main point is  that you don’t make excuses not to do something and there is a real reason for why you don’t want to/ can’t do it. 

You can use times I used in this blog 6months, 1 year etc. Or you can make ones that work for you. You can have goals for a week, or 3 months. What ever works for you.

Why bother with goals?

There is a lot of positive effects of having goals. It keeps you active physically and mentally. It gives you something else than just your normal routine to work on, and it is so very important to keep your mind on its toes. No one wants to become stagnant in their lives. Too much comfort, and no change can lead to serious consequences including depression.

I would love to hear from you and how you feel about goals. Do you have many goals? Do you feel pressured to reach those goals faster than you feel comfortable. If you would like some tips and tricks to reach goals, that might not have been mentioned before please like and comment on this post. Happy goal planning!

Xoxo,

The Writer

Goals

What does your success look like?

Look I know that the idea of having millions a swimming pool and thirty Gucci bags seems appealing but is that what your success really looks like? There are so many different ways to be successfully.

When I was younger I felt like success was becoming a doctor or a lawyer and having loads of money and obviously traveling like crazy and all that jazz. And sure traveling still appeals to me BUT, now I want my success to be more about how I feel rather than what I have.

I am not saying that money doesn’t appeal to me, because of course it does. And I would love to one day be able to do things that I can’t right now because I feel like I do not have enough money. But the thing is, no matter how much money you have, if you aren’t at peace within you, you will never be happy.

But you have to figure out what your success feels like, not just how it looks like. Because as we all know, not everything is as it seems.

Do you want to be able to help a lot of people? Do you want people to recognize you? Do you want to be a mysterious  person with an amazing talent but no-one knows your real name? Maybe your success is having 50 puppies, maybe its having 5 kids in a house near a beach and you can write your blog every other day. Who knows. But you should figure out, what will make you actually happy.

Some questions to ask yourself while thinking about this:

  1. Will having X make me want to wake up early in the morning to get my day started?
  2. What am I ready to give up in order to feel like that?
  3. Do I want it out of jealousy/ because it looks nice or because it will make me happy?
  4. Do I want this or does someone else want  this for me?

Good luck on your journey!

xoxo,

The Writer