Let’s begin with the basics. Life is full of negativity. And our beloved high functioning brain, loves to get stuck on that negativity. It is a part of our survival mechanism to see the bad things in life more, so we are more careful and thus have bigger chance of survival. But we no longer live in the situation, where we should protect ourselves from the dangers nature has to offer, at least not usually. So we have to work against the natural wiring that our brains have. It isn’t easy, mostly because its a natural response our brain has but also because there is so so so much negativity going on in the world right now that the rays of positivity seem impossible to see but they aren’t. I have couple of tips and tricks up my sleeve that at least help me when I feel like everything is going down the gutter.
- Realize that being unhappy, negative, tired, uninspired is a human thing to feel. It is normal. Do not try to fight it. If you feel like crying, cry. If you feel like cursing, do it (just not at someone, that might just lead into more trouble really.) Do not lock the bad feelings inside. If you do not let the negative energy out, it will just swirl around your body and mind until it gathers more and more negativity, and something small can in the end seem like a freaking tornado.
- Do not keep it a secret. Now of course there is a place and time to share things. If someone tells you that their dog died, don’t add to their misery with your issues and problems. But sometimes if someone asks you if you are OK, just say that actually I am not really right now. Or if no one asks then you can go to a close friend or family member and ask them for a bit of time “I’m sorry I’m feeling really under the weather and I can’t seem to collect my thoughts, could I just talk with you for a bit?” The important part with having a conversation with someone is to at least consider what they respond to you. If they offer some tips and tricks, try them out. There is not harm done even if they don’t work, but they don’t feel like you are just whining and not interested in feeling better.
- Write it down. Not only does this help you organize your thoughts from “All is shit” “I suck” “Person X is an asshole” to a more organized, more descriptive text. Try to always think why things are how they are. Why is all shit and why do you feel you suck and why is Mr./Mrs. X an asshole. You will also feel better because you got at least some of the negativity on the paper, outside of you.
- PAMPER ROUTINE! Do something nice to yourself. Go out with friends for a coffee or a drink (in this case do not talk about your issues, this is to calm down and forget about your issues). Go for walk. Drink coffee/tea/hot coco. Go for a coffee alone, order something extremely unhealthy, because, come on, you deserve it! Read a book, watch a film/series. Take a bath/shower. Just make yourself feel good.
- Last but not least, get yourself together. Not matter what it is that got you feeling like shit after you have let it out, talked it over and pampered yourself, let it go. (feel free to sing the song from Frozen.) Get up, go to your cupboard, get dressed, put on make up ( if you use it, you can also just do a skin care routine) get your hair looking human, organize your room and just show up. I don’t mean literally show up, but organize yourself so that you would be ready to show up anywhere. This gives a distinguished line between a self pitying blob ( that is totally OK for a while) and the high functioning queen/king that you are.
Do not let yourself get deeper into the swirl of negativity. Trust me if you want to find negativity and issues you will. There is more shit in this world that anything else. BUT if you want to find the positive things to concentrate it is very possible to do. Just find the things that make you happy and concentrate on those. Do the things you love and spend time with those who you love.
Side note: If you have depression please do not feel like my text means to “get over it”. In the case of an actual depression contact a doctor and get actual help. These tips are for short term negative feelings that anyone has. Not a holistic way of healing. A lot of energy and power for your journey as well. Hope these tips will make you feel at least a bit better, if you still decide to try them out.
What kind of tips do you guys have to get yourself functioning with a better happier energy? Please do share.