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Stars sentenced to death

We read about suicides almost every week, drug overdoses and alcohol poisonings and so on. It is so common it almost feels normal. It shouldn’t be normal. This post is inspired by deaths of appreciated stars like Tim Bergling known as Avicii, Verne Troyer famous actor, and many others who’ve taken their own lives; By their own hand or through substance abuse is irrelevant.

“Well yes in the music business it is quite usual for someone to use too much of alcohol/drugs.” “Yes well, genius people often are depressed.” “Well, of course, they kill themselves and turn to drugs with so much pressure, it was to be expected.”

The actual truth is that they are dead because of us.

How many of us just love this artist, or despise another one. All of us have these opinions of people. He is cool, she is a bitch, that person is a slut and omg I wish I could marry xyz.

Who are we to judge them or to love them? We know nothing of them actually, just sometimes read an article of who fucked up and how they were dressed. Why are we talking about them like they wouldn’t be just like us…people?

Someone “smart” will say or think but they chose to be stars they should accept that they will be criticized and judged?

Is a doctor judged by the way he looks or whether not he has a good looking wife? Mostly a doctor is judged by a work well/badly done. Do we judge stars that way? No. We judge them by how they walk, dress, breath, sleep, have sex and whether or not they have made mistakes that anyone could do and probably has done.

All that we hate in ourselves we feel comfortable to judge in other people. And not just a little bit. We torture those people and we send them death threats and we spit on them. We make them suffer, because we don’t want to accept the fact that they are just like us, human.

Oh, how we salivate after a tabloid to just see a glimpse of someone who’s life isn’t perfect so we wouldn’t feel so miserable about not really being important. For not being perfect. For being very human, normal and not interesting. We need to see those people in the limelight to suffer and bleed so  we don’t feel so bad of being insignificant.

How many journalist have had to pester those stars, walk into bathrooms after them because we people pay for that shit. We pay to find out who cheated on whom and who dumped whom. And lets not forget all the love/hate letters people send to the stars “Omg I love you, you are amazing and I will kill you if you don’t love me back” That is love in its purest form folks. I hope someone would write me that. Maybe my boyfriend will one day. “Sighs happily”…

This frustrates me so much, people say well they just start hanging in the wrong groups and it is quite normal in the music business or among actors. Please let’s stop this bullshit. If they would be happy, relaxed and feel safe they wouldn’t feel the need to run to “mother’s little helper”. No one who is absolutely fine is going to go and ruin their body with drugs or alcohol. It might be a mental illness, it could be the stress maybe its a mixture of all, but those people aren’t fine. They are ill and miserable way before they even start using substances.

We will always want to have someone to look up to. Someone to compare ourselves to and that is fine. But there has to be a limit. A while back I saw a small video of Michael Jackson being an interview. And he was asked what he thought about touring. And he said he hated it. That he was stressed while doing it that he couldn’t sleep and he hated it. But that isn’t what we saw. No, the interviewer asked him to not say it like that. He asked Michael Jackson not to be so negative about it because the “viewers” don’t want to hear that. So the late singer had to tell the cameras that he loves the touring. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dLJ8eGSJ-Ks )

These people can’t  tell us that they aren’t alright. They have to lie, because if they don’t they won’t be “loved” by us. Because really we don’t give a flying shit about these people. If we did, we’d treat them with the respect they deserve. Even if they make mistakes, bad ones, they deserve respect.

Judging is a normal thing people do, but especially now with the internet, words have way more power than we think. Let’s give people their right to make mistakes let karma do the rest. We aren’t anyone’s judge and jury and stars definitely don’t deserve a death sentence.

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Are you addicted to internet? I am

While researching this topic  I found an article written by Billi Gordon: “How social media is harmful to your brain and relationships”.  (PsychologyToday)

The phrase that stood out the most was  “Right place, wrong brain” What he meant by this, is that our brain isn’t up to date with the new technology. Our brain still lives in the society where we have to be afraid of bears and wolves. Our brain really needs an update, but it seems our brain evolves very slowly, last change has been about 6 000 (Correct me if I am wrong) years ago, and major changes were probably 10 000 years ago if not more.

According to Gordon’s article, there have been negative impacts to our health from overuse of the internet. Ventral Tegmental Area (VTA) in our brain, that monitors our social needs, doesn’t see the difference between social behavior online and in real life. This means that we get as much dopamine, the feel-good hormone, from a successful picture post to Instagram as we would if we would have an actual conversation with a person.

This also means if we don’t get “enough” likes our pleasure hormone levels go into deficits. This experience could be compared to being banished from a tribe for our ancestors, as Gordon states. The problem with VTA in regards to social media is that is can’t control its reactions. It is too primitive.

Social media encounters are seen as a threat by our brain, and internet trolls and death threats aren’t helping our brain with that. These experiences are stored in the hippocampus that works as the memory center in our brain.  It then compares what it sees on the outside with the information that it has already obtained. Technically every time we are on social media, we are reinforcing some sort of a version of the reality into our hippocampus, whether it’s negative or positive.

Due to the perceived threat, our Hypothalamic Pituitary Adrenal axis initiates the stress response. The same as in the old times would have made us run from wild animals. The issue with is is that stress in small doses is perfectly normal, healthy even. But stress on the daily, many times a day can lead to elevated blood pressure, which is meant to help us in a fight or flight situation.

Too much stress can lead to cardiovascular diseases, insulin resistance, diabetes, and obesity plus many other health issues, whether physical or mental. Stress makes us reactive, as we stop thinking logically and think with the animal part of the brain “Survive now, ask questions later” as Gordon put in his article.

It also makes us more awkward in actual social situations, online we are way more comfortable just saying what we think and being ourselves (or assholes sometimes). A YouTube video by Asapscience mentioned 5 ways that social media is changing our brains and behavior. First of all due to the fast dopamine release when we use social media 5-10% of internet users are not fully in control of when they use it. Have you sometimes noticed that you reach for your phone because you swear you heard a bling or it “vibrated”? This phenomenon is called Phantom vibration syndrome and it is fairly new, but the idea of it is terrifying. Can you imagine, that your brain is so addicted to the social media, it will imagine a sound just to get to check it again?

Dopamine releases are so addictive, that actual brain scans reveal that people with drug addiction have similar impairment in their brains as internet addicts.

What else are we all addicted to? Talking about ourselves, in a normal face to face conversation we talk about ourselves 30-40% but online it is up to 80%. And imagine how much dopamine is released when you are celebrated by hundreds of people? Or how horrible it feels if no one likes that one super cute picture of you?

Social media is giving us the same dopamine boosts as love, motivation, and orgasms give. Imagine the generation that would rather just sit on the computer than find love or have the satisfaction of finishing a demanding task. Or that likes to pretend that we achieved something just because the picture of our dog got up to 100 likes (or more, if you are really famous online), oh wait that generation sounds a bit like the current one… oh shit…

What is the harm in being addicted to social media/internet?  Spending hours in front of the computer for work, plus social media? Not going out with real friends because Friends are airing their 6000000th episode? (Or you have to watch all the previous ones) Not being satisfied with anything because it doesn’t happen in 1.5 seconds? All of these things are going to affect your life and how fulfilled you feel in it. I have often felt and still feel like I am unmotivated and “shit” at something because it doesn’t happen fast enough. Or I start looking at social media or my email in the morning and I feel like I don’t even want to get up because that girl is so pretty and I am not and also I have to answer to 5 emails.

Schedule social media and emails in, if you lose people with taking care of yourself? Well, then those people weren’t supposed to follow or be your friends anyway. Adios to them!

It has been a while since I have written, how this post makes up for it a bit. I should be back with full vengeance again. Please tell me what you thought about this blog and what you would like to learn next. Until next time 

– Alisa
Sources:

Social Media Is Harmful to Your Brain and Relationships, Billi Gordon, Ph.D. 

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/obesely-speaking/201710/social-media-is-harmful-your-brain-and-relationships)

5 Crazy ways Social Media is changing your brain right now, AsapScience, Youtube

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HffWFd_6bJ0

Is the human brain still evolving?

https://science.howstuffworks.com/life/inside-the-mind/human-brain/brain-evolution1.htm

 

 

 

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Be taught and teach

For couple of days now I have been watching people from TOTALLY different specks of life tell their story, their vision on Tom Bilyeu’s show Impact Theory. And not only is all that I have watched been so extremely inspirational, I understood, that we ALL learn all the time AND that we all teach all the time. Let’s get deeper in my idea and what I think this could or should mean.

So my idea as a whole is that we suck information from our surroundings, people, books, online sources and so on. And this information can be true or untrue, wrong or right. That doesn’t matter because in order to learn something it doesn’t matter if it is true or not. It is enough that we believe that it is.

As we learn new things, we right away start teaching other. As kids, we are often told to say sorry if we do something wrong, right? So if someone does wrong to us and they don’t say sorry, we end up telling them about it. “Hey, my mommy says you have to says sorry if you do XYZ” And obviously this an VERY early on example, but I think you get the point.

I strongly believe, that realizing this fact, and absorbing this idea, could be a tremendous help. Imagine what the world would be like, if those people who write books, blogs, make youtube videos or hold long speeches, wouldn’t exist? No Aristotle, no Platon, no DaVinci, Voltaire, Oprah no Tom Bilyeu or anyone else you find has in a way or another influenced today’s world. If they wouldn’t exist or their works wouldn’t, there wouldn’t be knowledge.

Einstein could have written all his theories and said F*** this S*** and burned all that he figured out. Same goes to all the others. And that would just make our world of knowledge very very empty. Obviously this is just what if’s, but I swear I have a point here.

We learned all the things we have from other, normal people. So why is it that when we want to influence, our first reaction is that “I’m alone I can’t make impact”? I mean all the other people were alone with their thoughts, I mean especially the Philosophes, “normal” people rarely understood what they ment, because talk about meta philosophy sometimes.

What if all the influencer also would have thought that they can’t make an impact. And really do they even care? I mean if you think you have something worth spreading, it might now win a nobel price, BUT I am sure someone will read it. And if you work hard enough and long enough, I am sure you will gain the platform that will help you shoot the message you have to the wide audience.

And even if it doesn’t have this snowball effect where everyone will be cheering you onto a stage in front of thousands of attendees. It can be small things that, if a lot of people separately do, it will affect the masses.

For example, if  you want to lessen sexism, why wait for “influential ” people to make a difference. Teach the people around you, your kids, your friends, write blogs etc. Or you want someone  to be excited about math? Teach them that.

Attention, nothing can be force fed, or the person might choke on it. But by giving them an example, telling your opinion, in the end it might just be that your actions have made an impact to the world.

There is this paradox in everything, every one who ever became an influencer, was first all alone in their spreading of their belief. Many of them are dead, and got a following of thousands only after their death, BUT  no one can say that they didn’t make an impact.

Just choose your words and thoughts wisely, and let us all, work as individuals, to make our togetherness on this planet the  best it can be.

Thank you for reading

-Alisa

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A rant: Which truth is more true?

I love watching youtube and I love social media. I love people and I love long talk with people. But some things bother me, but especially this one: Assuming that one person knows the whole truth about everything.

I notice this pattern online. Someone says something at it resonates with some people, and someone says something that contradicts it, and the first thing they do to the person who dared to have a different opinion? Attack! (This is SPARTA).

I mean yes, if someone is on purpose being mean and evil then, of course, you have to step in and say something, and maybe even if they aren’t mean, leaving a comment with your opinion isn’t bad. But when we go into personal things like ” You are just ugly and jealous and you don’t get this and the other person has more followers so they must be right” then that’s just plain stupid.

I notice that most often it is just best to not say anything if you aren’t 100% sure you don’t come off as rude. The thing is, no matter how much you tell your opinion online, there will ALWAYS be someone who disagrees, and that is not always a bad thing.  Disagreeing is a gate for discussion, not always does it lead to anything good but sometimes it does. You have to be the judge of the situation, though, and think if it really is important to prove yourself to be right.

And sometimes even if you know you are right, then it’s smarter to just walk away. Some conversations are just never going to end and will suck the life from you, when someone “knows” something, no matter what you say will change their mind. So just save your breath and have a discussion with someone who can teach you something or who is open to being taught. In the end, you can not get through a wall if there is no weak spot in it.

Live and let live, not all arguments are to be won and you don’t always have to be right. Sometimes there can be multiple truths and sometimes it doesn’t matter what the truth is. As long as you are confident in what you believe in and that makes you happy (and doesn’t hurt anyone else) then just continue believing in what you believe.

For the love of what is holy, please get off your high horses people, really, chances are we are all wrong.

-The Writer

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A rant; Trash

I have a lot of stuff. I have so much stuff that I do not need that I don’t always remember what I even have. I have clothes I don’t wear and I have a lot of stuff I could give away or sell. I am not a hoarder but over time there are just things that accumulate and somehow they just stay around. And  I bet most of you can relate. But this isn’t really my issue right now, though its certainly an important thing to remember and I have it on my to do list to lessen the amount of crap I have.

My issue is the total disregard for anything we own. The disrespect we have for money and the amount of trash we produce every year. For example have some of you noticed the videos on Instagram that are “so satisfying” but then they are just about cutting a phone up, or dropping it from X high building or shooting 7 phones to see if the bullet goes through the 8th one. Yeah, there are those types of people. And I am not even talking about trashy phones, I am talking about really expensive I phone. Not that it’d matter in the end because my biggest concern is the amount of waste, problematic waste that produces. It isn’t like they are cutting up a flower that will later on turn to dirt. No it is metal and plastic, and if its properly broken or cut apart can those parts even be used again?

Even if those phones would be given to the video maker for free. Or they would be faulty ones that would go to the trash anyway, those videos teach people something very dangerous. We do not have to care or take care about what we own, because it is replaceable. And that thought that idea is dangerous, not because it wouldn’t be true to an extent but because we are already abusing our planet, we already have so much stuff we don’t need and so much we throw out every day, that the attitude that we can continue doing that with no consequences is dangerous. And very sad.

I feel sad that kids these days don’t even feel sorry for breaking their phones because they know they will get a new one. I feel sad that some people find it satisfying to just break and damage stuff that another person with less privileges can’t even imagine ever having. If you have so much money to just throw away, then throw it at someone who needs it. Invest in your education or business, do not trash our already dying planet.

I am not a hardcore activist. I have a phone and I have stuff I don’t really need, just like all of us do. But to on purpose, without any thought or regret trashing our planet, adding to the already drastic changes that our planet is having, is immature, sad and just plain neglectful of our future generation as well as the animals that live here. So please for the love of our future, this planet or what ever you actually find dear, think before you break something, think before you add salt to the wounds of this planet. Haven’t we done enough damage?

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Self love for 2017

Daily we hear of how we are supposed to look like. I mean we are trying to get into the “everyone is beautiful” mentality and I think it’s great BUT I don’t think it is enough for the media to be telling us these things. I quite frankly do not like that we are all the time told that it is media’s fault that we feel that we aren’t beautiful enough.  I don’t think we can blame someone else for how we feel inside. If we are sure of who we are and we love ourselves the way we are, no matter what someone says we won’t start changing for their “personal preference”.

And let’s be brutally honest here, who is actually buying the gossip about who got implants and where and who is the prettiest woman on the planet in 2016.

We are the ones who buy magazines or follow articles about the new celebrities and their butt implants or botox or something of the sort.

Today those models who still work for the mainstream model industry could just all say no to the way they are treated, told not to eat or photoshopped to look like alien gods and goddesses. We have a lot of power if we unite our forces, but it is scary and sometimes seems impossible, but I personally think we make it seem impossible because it is easier to pretend that we can’t affect things.

Now I am a young woman from Finland and I feel like the pressure here to look “perfect” isn’t as bad as in warmer countries. We kinda have to look like penguins with all of those layers of clothes we wear during the cold season. (About 9 months out of the year). But even I have had my issues with how I look. Comments of you look ugly, you are too thin etc. from people who you are close with isn’t always easy to hear. Especially when you logically know that there is really nothing wrong with you.

But what if we, me and you and everyone just say fuck you to media. I’m not saying you can’t acknowledge that someone looks pretty. What I am saying that we don’t let that standard of pretty define us. I will never look like some supermodel. Not only do I like pizza too much, I just don’t have the same proportions to become one. And that is fine. I will also never look like Kim Kardashian, mostly because I do not have such money, but also because we have different parents and genetically will never be able to look the same.

So what we really should be doing is just realizing that we are beautiful ourselves. I for example love the fact that I have green eyes. I have a nice lithe body. I am not in anyway fit, but I am working on it. For health reasons not to gain bikini body.

So let’s all make this year about loving ourselves the way we are. Fuck the media. Fuck how everyone one else looks ( not in a disrespectful way to all of the beautiful people in world). 2017- The year or self love.

Sincerely,

The Writer

 

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