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Tag: Life

What is Personal Development?

Personal Development is a lifestyle, at least in my opinion. It is a choice to make sure that you do not get stuck, that you keep moving forward and growing as a person. It is this idea, that no matter how much you know you never know enough and no matter how good you are at something you can always do better.

This doesn’t mean you should beat yourself over not being Mozart at the age of 15 or not being able to do the same kind of discoveries as Einstein. Look all of us have the things that we are either better or worse at. We get inspired by different things and that is fine. The important part is to be inspired. To find interest in whatever it is that we find interesting.

Personal Development is a healthy choice. It is a choice where you have control over the kind of person you are and want to become. It makes a huge difference when you can be educated and interesting to not only others but to yourself. Reading, writing, being an artist of any kind. Being sportive being a motivator, all of those things fall under being interested in developing, improving and growing yourself. To each their own. Really what makes you happy while trying to develop is your own business. It could be meditation, praying, reading 50 books in 2 weeks, watching documentaries. Whatever it is that you do, if it makes you grow, it really is worth the time and the effort.

But remember you do not have to pay 1000000000$$$ to someone to become a better version. Getting a book on the thing that interests you is great. Sitting and being mindful for 10 minutes, or even just 3 is great. In the end, it doesn’t take that much effort if you use about 30 minutes of your day, to become better, and who knows you might get hooked on it like me, and be doing it as much as possible.

Please comment below, how you like to better yourself. Let me know how your personal development journey started.

Xoxo,

The Writer

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What does your success look like?

Look I know that the idea of having millions a swimming pool and thirty Gucci bags seems appealing but is that what your success really looks like? There are so many different ways to be successfully.

When I was younger I felt like success was becoming a doctor or a lawyer and having loads of money and obviously traveling like crazy and all that jazz. And sure traveling still appeals to me BUT, now I want my success to be more about how I feel rather than what I have.

I am not saying that money doesn’t appeal to me, because of course it does. And I would love to one day be able to do things that I can’t right now because I feel like I do not have enough money. But the thing is, no matter how much money you have, if you aren’t at peace within you, you will never be happy.

But you have to figure out what your success feels like, not just how it looks like. Because as we all know, not everything is as it seems.

Do you want to be able to help a lot of people? Do you want people to recognize you? Do you want to be a mysterious  person with an amazing talent but no-one knows your real name? Maybe your success is having 50 puppies, maybe its having 5 kids in a house near a beach and you can write your blog every other day. Who knows. But you should figure out, what will make you actually happy.

Some questions to ask yourself while thinking about this:

  1. Will having X make me want to wake up early in the morning to get my day started?
  2. What am I ready to give up in order to feel like that?
  3. Do I want it out of jealousy/ because it looks nice or because it will make me happy?
  4. Do I want this or does someone else want  this for me?

Good luck on your journey!

xoxo,

The Writer

 

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How to spend your free time

Last time I mentioned we shouldn’t rush all the time. That it is okay to just do one thing at a time and actually have pauses. But what to do when you want to do something semi smart and not just sit and what TV, game etc. Which is totally okay as well. Once in a while. What smart is there to do and why do something semi productive during your rest time?

  1. Go for a walk: Going for a walk is going to kill a lot of birds with one stone. You get exercise, that in turn will make your brain work better and you will be less stressed.
  2. Read a book, blog post/listen to a podcast that isn’t just about some fiction/love etc. Reading, no matter what you are reading is good for your cognitive health but reading self-help or something similar will not only activate your brain but might give you ideas to your life. Same goes with listening to a podcast. Plus you can actually do something else like clean up at the same time.
  3. Watch a documentary. Watching something smart can just boost your knowledge and broaden your life views and that is always a good thing. Who knows when someone will ask you who was the third roman emperor.  ( It was Julius Cesar by the way https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Roman_emperors#Emperors_after_395)
  4. Talk to a mentor. It doesn’t matter who it is. It could be a brother or mother or someone online who you just met. But talking to someone who inspires you and makes you excited to be better and to work harder can never be a bad thing. This is especially helpful when you are just starting out you personal development journey.  If you have difficulties there  will always be someone, somewhere willing to help and guide you.

Here are some tips that I like to use. I do not always do this and trust me I waste way too much time just on youtube looking at productivity tips. But I try my best to improve with becoming more active mentally and these tips help me at least.

Good luck and until next time,

xoxo,

The Writer

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Meditation? Are you doing it right?

Yes you are, if it makes you feel peace and calm and serenity.

Look there will always be people who are 100% convinced that the only right way to do s*** is their way, and you better do it the same way. And I will be the first one to tell you not to spend time with those kinds of people, unless you must.

There are a HUGE amount of different types of meditations. I myself love doing mindfulness meditations or some type of guided meditations. But there are so many. Here is a few of the most common ones:

  • Transcendental Meditation: Rising above negativity, in a lotus position.
  • Heart Rhythm Meditation (HRM): Concentration on the heart and breathing. Is said to improve not concentration but also balance emotion and more.
  • Kundalini : Sitting in a lotus position. The goal is to breath through your energy centers; the chakras.
  • Guided Visualization: Visualizing what you want your feelings to be like, what you might want to be like yourself.
  • Qi Gong: Involves movement
  • Zazen: The goal is to stop judging your thoughts.
  • Mindfulness: being present in the moment, letting thoughts drift by but not getting stuck on them.

To read more about these visit: https://visualmeditation.co/7-types-of-meditation/

But even these might not be the right answer all the time. Maybe you feel so restless that sitting in one space for a long time, right now just makes you feel very anxious. Maybe if you try to force yourself into a certain type of meditation, you just feel like a failure. This is why I am writing this post.

Meditation is about letting go of everything but the present moment. In mediation there is no past nor future. Just right now. And that can be achieved with different ways, not just sitting like a flower on the floor.

I sometimes love to go on walks and listen to the nature and I feel more at peace and in the moment than any other time. I also love coloring an adult coloring book, because it is a mindless task to do, but you are still doing something while letting your mind wonder. For someone it might be going for a jog, petting a horse or something similar. And I will tell you right now, it is okay. Do not try to force yourself into something you aren’t comfortable with.

At the same time I urge you to not disregard mediation as some old “voodoo” thing, because it isn’t. Mediation is an extremely powerful and old method at calming the mind, body and soul, so do not just disregard the practice. Try doing it once in a while, and do not give up after one time. It takes time to master it, I haven’t mastered it even a bit, and I have been doing it for about 3 years now. But I have seen the benefits of it.  Try different ones and see what works best for you.

Thanks for reading and let me know what your favorite type of meditation is!

Xoxo,

The Writer.

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Law of Attraction

Daily I am more and more interested in the wonders of the Law of attraction or manifestation. I am aware that a lot of people do not believe in it. I how ever think it is a powerful tool, to take in to day to day life.

In short law of attraction is you attracting what you think about, weather or not it is conscious. So if you are all the time negative you will attract bad things, even things you specifically do not want to attract. But if you are positive then you will attract positivity. And for those who do not believe in this kind of a “voodoo” talk let me give you an example.

When you are in a bad mood, you tend to talk to others maybe a bit less politely and thus they do the same to you. Maybe you say something bad about someone and that someone finds out and confronts you etc. So negativity gives back negativity. But if you are positive and happy, you might give a compliment to someone, and by making them smile you smile even brighter, then someone will notice that smile and compliment you on it. See the pattern here? Law of attraction works with the same base line but on a deeper level.  For more in detail explanation on what Law of Attraction is visit this link:

http://www.thelawofattraction.com/what-is-the-law-of-attraction/

The reason why I am so excited about the law of attraction, is that it can make a huge difference to our lives. Concentrating on the positive is proven to improve our mental health and get us to work hard to improve ourselves as people. By using law of attraction not only will it help to achieve more goals, it will help enforce the positive in us and around us.

Law of attraction is NOT magic, it isn’t this pseudo science thing that will all of a sudden give you all the answers and a billion bucks. You have to work with it. It is a tool to help you. It is there to guide you, but it is not an answer without hard work. Do not assume that this will make your life easy. You have to work hard on what your beliefs are about you and the surroundings, you have to make a conscious change with how you live your life but if you do; you will see results like no other.

To those who wonder if I have seen results in my life with the Law of Attraction then the answer is yes. If I am positive, a lot more good happens to me. If I am negative I become extremely clumsy, I bump into things and I hit myself against objects etc etc.

If you find it hard to change your views, hard to achieve a consciously positive mind, I suggest you turn to meditation. It doesn’t have to be a long session of sitting on your buttocks for an hour. It can be what ever you enjoy doing, that will clear you mind; painting, drawing, coloring, writing, going for a walk. If you want more information, then please comment below and I can make a post about meditation and how I do not think there is a right or wrong way to do it.

Thanks for reading,

xoxo, The Writer

 

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Simplify your studying

I know I know, it is summer, who the F talks about school stuff now? I do. 1st I would like to point out that you can study when ever and studying could be just for your own pleasure and not relating to school what so ever, but making it more simple is very beneficial, no matter what your reason for studying is. So let’s begin shall we?

  1. Make a choice and stick to it. I know it is hard to figure out what our most important subject is at school or what interests us the most outside school but in the end this doesn’t really matter. Just chose a subject and stick to it for 30min-1h. Take everything of your table that isn’t related to that subject and study it. In the end it doesn’t matter if it wasn’t the most “important” one. The goal is to at least start with something.
  2. Do not color code or doodle. Now this will be controversial tip, I know. So many people want their notes to be pretty, and that is great and if color coding and drawing helps you even better! BUT I would suggest to do the doodling and color coding at the end of your notes taking time. This way you can see it as a little treat for yourself, and going over your notes with different pens and drawing things relating to the subject will work as a review.
  3. Use back up sources. I at least myself would often just read a book and concentrate on learning things by hear. And if something was given as homework I felt like I should be able to understand everything without extra research, so I ended up not retaining information, I just learned stuff by heart (if I did). But googling or checking things from a dictionary isn’t a bad thing. It is okay not to know a word or not to understand a difficult concept say in physics or the like. So make it easier for yourself and just google it (or ask someone who knows the subject better….”Mooooom what’s 1+1)
  4. Do not plan too much. You will never make a perfect plan and in the end it just takes a lot of time. Prioritizing in the end is quite simple. 3 Exams coming up? Study for those 3 exams. Which one should be prioritized you ask? Either the one that is going to be first or the one you feel you know the least. The same applies to just normal homework, essays etc. During the school week concentrate on the subject that you have had at school that day. That way the lecture is fresh in your mind.
  5. Update your planner daily, that way you won’t need to have 2h long study planning sessions and you will just see everything in your planner.
  6. Remember to rest. No one can work non stop. And won’t do any favors to yourself if you over work yourself. Even Hermione Granger had a burn out in Harry Potter and of Azkaban book.

Remember that studying and learning should be a satisfying experience where your mind grows and your views broaden and you become better as a person. It is part of personal development. Do not ruin your studying by dreading it too much or making it out to be about life or death, when it is not. You can only do your best, and you know exactly what that is. So keep going and do not give up. If you have any tips or questions do comment :3

Thanks for reading,

The Writer

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Debunking some life “Hacks”

So, we are often searching for ways to making our lives easier or more productive, and I think that it is a great way to develop as a person. (Just remember there is no elevator to success, you have to take the stairs). But I think some of the tips we are given, shouldn’t be listened to, at least not word for word.

  1. Do not drink right when you wake up. In theory drinking right away is a  great tip. BUT remember to first at least swish some water in your mouth and spit it out. This way you do not swallow all the bacteria that is in your mouth from the night prior. The best choice would be to wash your teeth or oil pull, but as a bear minimum at least gurgle a bit.
  2. Do not make the bed right away. The bacteria and moisture from your skin is going to  just rest under the covers and have a nasty party. Eat a breakfast first and then make your bed, if you have a window in your room you can open, do that as well, it will freshen your bed up.
  3. Eating breakfast right away might work for some people, but I rarely am hungry right away, and I personally do not think that it is healthy to force yourself to eat something right away. It will give a negative connotation to mornings and breakfast and that is just not cool. One way I tend to postpone breakfast if I am not at all hungry is by either getting ready and eating after than, or taking a sandwich and water with me. I can eat it on my way to school/work. This is something that depends a lot on the person.
  4. Exercising in the morning is NOT a must. Do not get me wrong. It can be a great way to start a day, but I for one am a hardcore evening bunny, so I have a lot more energy to move in the evening. That way I am tired for the night but I do not feel dead on my feet the whole day. Something that you can do right away in the morning that isn’t too exhausting is to stretch. It wakes you up and forces you out of bed.

Those are just some ideas I have and the two last ones are more my personal opinions or preferences. I hope you like this post and please comment if you have other ideas.

-The Writer

 

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I don’t know- and that’s ok

I am the wisest man alive, for I know one thing, and that is that I know nothing.

-Socrates

This quote is something that everyone should read and understand. We might feel we know a lot, or might feel we should know a lot, but in the grand scheme of things, the knowledge we have, or thing we have is the size of a bugs sh***. Almost non existent. Now that doesn’t mean you are stupid or that you should start reading like crazy and never sleep so that you will know a bit more. No, this quote at least for me has a calming effect. Most of the time we do not know anything, and that is ok.

If it will make you feel better I can list at least 10 things at the top of my head that I do not know (but maybe I should)

  1. I do not know my purpose.
  2. I do not know most of the major rivers on the planet
  3. I do not know all of the major events in history.
  4. I do not know how old I will live to be.
  5. I do not know if I will have kids in the future.
  6. I do not know if I am studying what I really should.
  7. I do not know half of the compositions/composers I listen to. (classical music)
  8. I know little to nothing about Socrates and yet I used his quote here.
  9. I do not know what my day is going to be like tomorrow.
  10. Physics, maths and chemistry is ALL a huge mystery to me. ( I do know 1+1=2)

These are some things I do not know, and yes I am fully aware that some of the things are just lack of sophistication on my part. ( I promise to read upon at least some of the subjects) but somethings I do not know about is just that they are topics that are much bigger than what I am, like the reason why am I here, what will future bring and how I will die. Those things I will find out one day, but for now I am glad to live in the big un-known.

Do not think of yourself as failure, stupid, not good enough if/when you don’t know everything. Socrates is one of the most known Philosophers of our time ( I mean documented human time here) and yet he had the balls to admit he actually knows nothing. And he really wasn’t stupid now was he?

Keep going keep learning and keep reaching new heights but remember, no one, will ever know everything, and that is the beauty of life.

xoxo

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Be gone negativity!

Let’s begin with the basics. Life is full of negativity. And our beloved high functioning brain, loves to get stuck on that negativity. It is a part of our survival mechanism to see the bad things in life more, so we are more careful and thus have bigger chance of survival. But we no longer live in the situation, where we should protect ourselves from the dangers nature has to offer, at least not usually. So we have to work against the natural wiring that our brains have. It isn’t easy, mostly because its a natural response our brain has but also because there is so so so much negativity going on in the world right now that the rays of positivity seem impossible to see but they aren’t.  I have couple of tips and tricks up my sleeve that at least help me when I feel like everything is going down the gutter.

  1. Realize that being unhappy, negative, tired, uninspired is a human thing to feel. It is normal. Do not try to fight it. If you feel like crying, cry. If you feel like cursing, do it (just not at someone, that might just lead into more trouble really.) Do not lock the bad feelings inside. If you do not let the negative energy out, it will just swirl around your body and mind until it gathers more and more negativity, and something small can in the end seem like a freaking tornado.
  2. Do not keep it a secret. Now of course there is a place and time to share things. If someone tells you that their dog died, don’t add to their misery with your issues and problems. But sometimes if someone asks you if you are OK, just say that actually I am not really right now. Or if no one asks then you can go to a close friend or family member and ask them for a bit of time “I’m sorry I’m feeling really under the weather and I can’t seem to collect my thoughts, could I just talk with you for a bit?” The important part with having a conversation with someone is to at least consider what they respond to you. If they offer some tips and tricks, try them out. There is not harm done even if they don’t work, but they don’t feel like you are just whining and not interested in feeling better.
  3. Write it down. Not only does this help you organize your thoughts from “All is shit” “I suck” “Person X is an asshole” to a more organized, more descriptive text. Try to always think why things are how they are. Why is all shit and why do you feel you suck and why is Mr./Mrs. X an asshole. You will also feel better because you got at least some of the negativity on the paper, outside of you.
  4. PAMPER ROUTINE! Do something nice to yourself. Go out with friends for a coffee or a drink (in this case do not talk about your issues, this is to calm down and forget about your issues). Go for walk. Drink coffee/tea/hot coco. Go for a coffee alone, order something extremely unhealthy, because, come on, you deserve it! Read a book, watch a film/series. Take a bath/shower. Just make yourself feel good. 
  5. Last but not least, get yourself together. Not matter what it is that got you feeling like shit after you have let it out, talked it over and pampered yourself, let it go. (feel free to sing the song from Frozen.) Get up, go to your cupboard, get dressed, put on make up ( if you use it, you can also just do a skin care routine) get your hair looking human, organize your room and just show up. I don’t mean literally show up, but organize yourself so that you would be ready to show up anywhere. This gives a distinguished line between a self pitying blob ( that is totally OK for a while) and the high functioning queen/king that you are.

Do not let yourself get deeper into the swirl of negativity. Trust me if you want to find negativity and issues you will. There is more shit in this world that anything else. BUT if you want to find the positive things to concentrate it is very possible to do. Just find the things that make you happy and concentrate on those. Do the things you love and spend time with those who you love.

Side note: If you have depression please do not feel like my text means to “get over it”. In the  case of an actual depression contact a doctor and get actual help. These tips are for short term negative feelings that anyone has. Not a holistic way of healing. A lot of energy and power for your journey as well. Hope these tips will make you feel at least a bit better, if you still decide to try them out.

What kind of tips do you guys have to get yourself functioning with a better happier energy? Please do share.

With love,

The Writer

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Picking and Choosing?

I often get inspired by a lot of things. I mean I listen to music 99% of the time that I am awake ( sometimes when I sleep too) I watch YouTube videos and I absolutely love reading about different lifestyles people have.

But there are some things that bother me. That being, people who assume that their lifestyle is 100% the best. Or that there is only one way to apply the lifestyle they have.

A great example is minimalism. I mean you guys have no idea how many comments I have seen on someone’s blog post or video where people tell the person/ writer that they are doing the minimalism thing wrong because they own more than say 20 things. And I mean that is ridiculous. If you do some research online one of the first results is this:

Minimalism is a tool to rid yourself of life’s excess in favor of focusing on what’s important—so you can find happiness, fulfillment, and freedom.

Joshua Fields Millburn & Ryan Nicodemus

For some reason, a lot of people understand the word minimalism only within the context of how much and what you own, but really it goes so much deeper than that. Minimalism is to do with everything that brings you value in life, family, passions, work, home, friendships and spirituality as well. For everyone what you feel like is excess is different. I mean someone who’s passion is being a makeup artist can not get rid of their makeup collection, while I can have a minimal one. Someone who is a mother can’t get rid of all of the toys her kids have just because that makes her own more than 50 objects.

But both of those people can sever toxic relationships. Both can decide to concentrate on the important things in life like family, friends and their passions. Still, both of their minimalism is going to look different. Nothing is black and white, not even minimalism.

But this kind of a view is around us a lot, not just with minimalism, this is common with a healthy lifestyle where someone eats XX amount of some food and now everyone should do the same, or how some people have a certain sense of style and everyone should be the same. I mean I love neutral colors but I still have colorful clothes too. And I love mozzarella salad but I still eat a lot of other foods too.

My point is that you do not have to just choose this one way of thinking or being. It’s ok to eat junk food once in a while and still regard yourself as healthy. It is ok to own more than 50 things and consider yourself as a minimalist. You choose your own rule that you live by, and as long as you do not harm anyone else then that is perfectly fine.

In case you wanted to read the blog about minimalism I quoted earlier the link is: http://www.theminimalists.com/minimalism/

Hope you enjoyed the post, and please leave a comment. What do you think about this? Do you agree? Have you had the same experiences as me?

Xoxo, Alisa

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