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Category: Goals

New way of Goal Setting

Ages ago I stumbled upon a fascinating youtube interview between Marie Forleo and Daniel LaPorte. In case you are interested in taking a peak; the video is here: Goal Setting.

Instead of the basic goal setting that we are accustomed to; lose weight, travel the world, gain x amount of money. What this interview dives into, are the feelings you get when you achieve something you want. So instead of lose weight you would say you want to feel sexy/beautiful/confident. Instead of having x amount of money you want to feel free/secure/abundance. And you goal, is to achieve that feeling, not the tangible amount of money or a six pack.

Why should it be the feeling you go after? Well x amount of money that you assume is going to make you happy, might not make you happy. Usually people assume that they need way more than what they actually need. Maybe you are able to be very comfortable with a 100 000 a year instead of the million you thought. 100 000 a year is still 8, 333 thousand per month. That is definitely something you can live comfortably with. And you having a million probably wont make you that much happier. It might even just cause you stress, where to put that money, what if your friends are there because you are rich etc. etc. etc.

What about feeling sexy instead of having a six pack? Well, maybe you wouldn’t feel sexy with a six pack. Maybe you prefer the flat belly, or a little bit of more curves. As long as you are healthy and you feel sexy, that is the most important goal. That is what you should concentrate on.

So now, there is a bit over a half a year left. Instead of living your life by achieving things. Achieve feelings. How do you want to feel when 2020 rolls around the corner. It is much easier to find motivation in feeling happy, content, excited and full of life, rather than x amount of money, a job that pays well or a body that doesn’t even feel like yours anymore.

Thanks for reading! What are your feeling goals for the next 6 + months?

P.S Happy belated Easter!

Xoxo

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Gamify your success

When you play Super Mario, despite sometimes killing him of, you usually try again, and again…. and again. Sometimes this lasts for so long, you end up losing track of time, causing you to fail at doing something actually productive. But you can actually learn a lot from your games. There are numerous studies done, showing how gaming (a reasonable amount) is actually healthy and good for development. It helps with problem solving, motor skills and improves creativity. But today I am not talking about those benefits. I am however very open to write about that, if you are interested.

My topic today is about turning your actual life into a game. This is not originally my idea, a lot of people on YouTube and on their blogs, do challenges and use apps to make their life into a game. Some examples are Thomas Frank, The Goal Guys and Max Hertan.

What does it mean in practice? It means first of all that you have a goal. It could be writing a 10 page essay, or learning to do a split in 30 days. What ever your goal is, it can be gamefied. How to do it? I will break it down bellow, just like a real life video game, everyone will have their own approach, so feel free to tweak anything that you feel necessary.

  1. Have a goal. In a video game like Super Mario, it could be getting through a level or defeating Bowser. If it is defeating Bowser, you use the levels as your steps, until you are at the final showdown. If it is getting through a level your steps will be on a shorter scale, like jumping in the right place and killing the right enemy at the write time. So just like in a game, with a goal you have to come up with steps to win.
  2. Track your progress in a visible way. It wouldn’t be fun to play Mario or any other game, if you could never see how many enemies you have killed, or if you would never level up. That is the same in a real life goal. If you want to learn splits, make sure you document your progress. Even if you aren’t as close as you want to be to a split, at least you can see how far you have come, if you for example take pictures. Or you could mark in your calendar daily how many minutes you have stretched etc.
  3. Reward yourself. This is slightly controversial. There are a lot of people who are super successful, that think this is not helpful. And if you only do things because of a treat, instead of feeling the pride for getting healthier or for getting the project done. I can understand the concern. However I assume, that people don’t want to do things that seem big and daunting without some kind of small wins in between. So stretch while you watch a series you love. It’s two birds with one stone and it is more fun that way as well. Or after each page you have written of the essay you can go scratch your puppy. Make sure it is something that you don’t over do the rewarding tho. You don’t deserve to binge watch youtube for stretching your hamstrings for 2 seconds.
  4. Keep it real. if you start too many goals, too many projects and you try to make everything into a game, you might lose. You can’t play Mario, Call of Duty and solve the Rubik’s Cube all at the same time. The same thing with goals. Don’t beat yourself up for falling down or not getting through a level. Only beat yourself up, if you didn’t get back up to try again.

Here are some apps to helps you gamify your goals/tasks:

  • Habitica: Gamify Your tasks
  • Forest: Stay Focused
  • Fitness RPG- Gamify your Pedometer
  • Do it Now- RPG To Do List/ Task List

These are some of the apps you will get on an android device. I am sure there are many for the Apple phones as well.

Thanks for reading! This post was really fun to write, as this is something I want to incorporate more into my life, to get more exciting and interesting things done (as well as the mandatory ones). What are some of your goals you would like to turn into a game?

Thanks for reading 😉 Untill next time

Xoxo

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Productive resting

Having freedom is dangerous. What if you never do anything actually good for you and your health, whether it is mental or physical? What if when you make your choices you don’t think about how they will affect you in a couple of years?

I am a lazy person. I could easily just veg out and watch YouTube for my whole life. How ever I try really hard not to do that, so what can I or us do that will make us feel rested but still not be a total waste of time.

I want to put a disclaimer here because I am sure someone is feeling very threatened that someone dares to tell them not to watch YouTube. You can do it. Just keep your head in the game and don’t over do it.

If you would die today. Would you feel like you had a fulfilled life? Would you feel like you did all that you could to achieve goals? Did you get anything done from your bucket list? No? Me neither.

So here are some ideas for you to start resting productively, letssaaa go 😉


Photo by Sidney M. on Unsplash
  • Make a bucket list of things you want to try. This can be an event you want to participate in, a habit you want to try, anything. I will next list out ideas that could go into your bucket list.
  • Date night; this can be with you and your partner, you and yourself or maybe you and your friends. Whom ever you will share this time with, try to plan. Don’t make it too simple like; Veg out and watch YouTube. That is what we want to avoid doing. Maybe plan an outing or a game night. Of if you are doing a date night alone, plan a pamper routine. Read a book you have put aside for “when I have time”…. yeah the time is this date night 😉
  • Travel to a destination that you want to visit. This could be near or far away, what ever suits your life right now. If you can’t afford to go on a road trip on your own, how about you save up for a while and ask your friends/partner join you. This way you will be able to have more money and not be alone. However there is nothing wrong with going on your own. It might just be a bit of a longer time that you have to save, depending where you want to go. Plan it out.
  • Meditate
  • Watch a Skillshare video that will teach you something and actually implement it: Skillshare To try out click here and get a 2 months free try out. (I am not sponsored at all I will however get one month free for everyone who becomes a premium member after the 2 months are up)

Photo by JESHOOTS.COM on Unsplash
  • Watch a documentary. And don’t be passive about it. Write up notes as you watch. Check out some details after. It might never do anything for you or one day you might impress your potential boss by knowing about something that they wouldn’t have expected you to have know. (You can obviously do for the sake of curiosity as well)
  • Practice a skill. It might be doing a handstand, maybe a Yoga pose. What ever it is. Just use a couple of hours to work on that skill. Who knows it might become your thing 😉
  • I kind of already mentioned this but read. Read read read. It makes you rest from what ever you have to do. But it is still keeping your brain active. If you read a non fiction book you can learn and maybe implement new ideas. But even with a fiction book, you will get a lot of benefits. Making up a world in your head and escaping the reality can do great things for your health and creativity in your own projects. I personally at least feel like I am a lot more rested after reading a fiction book than just staring at the screen for ages.
  • Go for a walk. Yes it is that simple
  • Figure yourself out. Journal, have a journal prompt. Figure out anything you can about you. Isn’t it weird sometimes that we know a friend better than we know ourselves? I mean why can we give advice to a friend but when it comes to ourselves we are clueless? Well…. maybe after journaling and figuring things out, you can give advice to yourself
  • In case my ideas didn’t show case my point I shall write it here in a more clear way. When I am mentioning productive resting I mean getting our mind of work/studies or what ever else is stressing you out, and giving it a break, while not shutting it totally off. Shutting off is sometimes a good thing. But when it becomes a method to procrastinate, or to veg out totally, it becomes unhealthy. And while I am sure that the ideas I mentioned in this post are something you can still over do, but most of the time the risk is smaller than with say Instagram, YouTube or other social media.

If you want some ideas for challenges you could do or things to put on bucket lists check out the Goal Guys on YouTube (no the irony isn’t lost on me) Goal Guys My favourite video from them right now is this : I tried to go 7 Days Without Procrastination One of the reasons why I love them is because they inspire you to gamefy your goals and try new things without huge commitment fear 😉

Also here is a link to my bucket list on Pinterest: Bucket list Pinterest

Thanks for reading and hope to hear from you in the comments. What should I write about next? What are your bucket list items?

Xoxo, Changed Life

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The perfect little lie

Tomorrow, I will start my new life. I will get 25 things done (half of which take 5h each) I will learn 20 languages and I will never, ever put things off ever again. And what happens the next morning at 5 am? Snooooooooooze.

So what what is the act of putting things of called? Procrasitnation.

Why do we procrastinate? If we are talking from a human experience point of view I would say we procrastinate for couple of reasons. Some more acceptable than others.

  1. Fear of Failure We as humans need to succeed. Failing has often this humiliating affect on us. Instead of accepting that we learned how not to do something, we think we just failed for the rest of our lives. So the next time we don’t even try (and lets be honest. That is the real failure)
  2. Bad health habits. Now there is a lot of research done on how to optimize your brain and one of those ways is to be healthy. So eating a healthy balanced diet, exercising and sleeping enough. It is quite simple … how ever sometimes we seem to procrastinate on becoming healthy… what a vicious cycle it is.
  3. Being addicted to something; in today’s age it is increasingly easy to boast about how you don’t drink, smoke or do drugs. BUT do you perhaps touch your phone every 6 minutes? Because that is an addiction. If someone would alcohol every 6 minutes or smoke a cigarette that often, you wouldn’t question that they have an addiction but somehow with phones it isn’t the same?

If we discuss why we procrastinate from a biological/ physical point of view its due to our brains being structured to not want to do things that are difficult or that we are afraid of. So if our brain senses a danger (aka we dread a project) it automatically puts us into a mode of resistance to the hard thing, and we reach for the phone or what ever it is that we rather do. (Even though we are more adapted to resist difficult things do not make this your excuse, you’ll just live a miserable life.) Read more here: Science Behind Procrastination

How do we make sure that we leave procrastination to the minimal? (sometimes we are allowed to stumble)

  1. Place in routines that help you. Start your morning smartly. Instead of procrastinating getting up, make your alarm ring across your room (and don’t let it be your phone) Do maybe a couple of jumping jacks so you don’t feel like going back into bed. Wash your face with cold water …or take a cold shower. (it suck to take it btw.) But when you do difficult things right in the morning, when you are somehow still able to resist temptation it makes your rest of the day less resistance based.
  2. Figure out the issues you have: Is the project too large to conceptualize right away? Well make it into small sections, e.g. research, take notes, write paragraph 1-3 and 4-6 and lastly 6-10, proof read, come up with a good title, write down the resources you used and send it. Often times people get into this head space of the end goal. If you are obese and your eventual goal is to be a body builder, you will have to find small wins along the way. It can’t count as a failure if you don’t wake up next morning with six pack abs after eating healthy once or going to the gym once. With this logic it can’t be counted as a failure to take smaller steps in completing a project either.
  3. Figure out what motivates you. Not on a short term. But on a bigger scale. Is it being proud of doing the things you promised yourself you would do. Maybe you want to feel beautiful and healthy. Maybe you don’t like being stressed all the time. What ever it is for you, link your goals to feelings of fulfillment and satisfaction and joy. Things won’t bring joy on a longer time line. So don’t count yourself to deserve a coffee if you get done with a project. It is very easy to talk yourself into having a coffee because your need a pick me up. Trying to believe that you will be proud of yourself even if you fail in an exam, isn’t that easy.

What do you guys struggle with the most when it comes to procrastination? Leave it down in the comments. Would love to hear from you.

Thanks for reading and until next time.

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Who am I? (2019 edition)

About a year ago I wrote a blog post on how it was OK not to know who you are. That I change all the time and that it is fine as well. And I still agree to this to a degree. Not knowing who you are and if you will like the same thing you like now in about 3 months that is fine. But there are some core things that you should know. Or should at least know that you aspire to. 

My core things I aspire to be are:

  1. Fit and healthy; Really want to feel great and look sexy, I mean who wouldn’t, but remember everyone’s sexy is their own and feeling great is very personal as well.
  2. Smart; not only book smart but also have emotional smartness.
  3. A good person; note not perfect or great… just good. I need some room for mistakes and for being human we all do. 
  4. Goal orientated; I have always wanted to achieve a shit ton of things but never really put effort nor finished what I started so this year my goal is to get shit done not just talk about things. 

But the things that don’t matter is for example; how I achieve my fitness, is it cross country skiing? Nope. What do I enjoy doing as sports? I don’t really know yet, so I am going to work on trying a lot of things and figure it out from there. 

What do I concentrate on in becoming smart? Well, I am quite good at languages so that is a good start. I have been interested in History, it never hurts to know more. Add a bit of mathematics and sciences (what aspects precisely I don’t know) and I am pretty much ahead to all those who don’t want to be bothered with anything (I think I would like to write a bit of what I learn…. one blog post a month about a new topic I have learned about in a concise form, what do you guys think?) 

Cup of coffee and a book on a new topic <3

Being a better person? Well, take others more into consideration. Get less annoyed at people for not always being thoughtful. Being honest with people. For example, if I don’t want to go out or something along those lines. Making small gestures to make people happier.  

Having goals and achieving them is something I am sure pretty much everyone can work on. How many projects do you have just kind of being there but you not working on them? 100? Yeah me too. Just chose one and work on it for a month, daily. I know you can do it 😉 

New years is about becoming a better you. But I don’t think you have to become a new you. Just work on those things that are your weaknesses and make sure that you don’t let go those things that are your strengths. Good luck for the year to come! 

Comment your goals below or ask me anything! Thanks for reading and see you in my next post 😀 

Xoxo Alisa

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10 next things I want to do/achieve

1) Read 4 books a month (or more if you are feeling extra) – This is not to say that I have to read 3 books with 500 pages. One of the books could be a poem collection, one could be a longer book based on fiction and since I am at the stage in my studies that I have to write my final work, I will have to read for that too. 

2) Act according to what you read Whether you learn something from a book or a youtube video or from a friend. The only way you will actually change your life with that knowledge is if you implement it to your life. 

3) Go to the gym 4 times a week ( this won’t be easy for me) I really want to get my fitness back on track. I do not feel like I am at my best and I want to lose a little bit of my body fat and gain muscle. I really don’t want to be overboard and become a bodybuilder (nothing wrong if that is your goal tho) but I really want to get my health better.

4) Get things done even when I don’t feel like it.  I can’t say that this will happen every day without a fault. But imagine how much you can achieve if you do everything you say you will.

5) See my friends more often but with something interesting planned. I do not think we need to go always for coffee. Or even be at my or their place. I really think we could make more memories that will stick after 10 years too. 

6) Make a bit more effort with friendships. I do not mean that I would be a bad friend… I hope not. But I could make a bit more of an effort. Make a card for a birthday. Remember to send them something once in a while even if you would be busy and so on. 

7) Make an effort to get to know other people What is better than to meet new people and learn new things. It is comfortable to always just see the same friends. And they are great, but especially if you want to achieve new things then that is easiest to be done by learning new things from new people. 

8) Spend only up to 1 hour a day online Not counting work, because at work  I am quite a bit online and on the computer. But free time online shouldn’t be more than that per day. Apart from the weekends. I think I can’t let myself be online a bit more then (especially if I want to keep writing a blog too) 

9) Eat out less and eat healthier. I want to eat fewer foods with flour. I want to eat more greens and fruits. Maybe making my work food always vegan, if possible. I am not vegan and don’t really have a plan to become one. But eating less milk and meat-based products couldn’t be bad. Eat way fewer things with sugar or extra fat. 

10) Spend less money. I am horrible with money. I spend a lot of money on food, and mostly food that isn’t healthy. So, if I want to go out to eat, it shouldn’t be more often than once a month. If I go out more often I should only go for coffee and not buy anything more than that. Get a snack from the store before or eat before going for coffee. 

What are the 10 things you want to do achieve? Leave a comment 

xoxo Alisa

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5 things I will invest in next year (2019)

  1. Gym membership; I have a gym close by that costs about 20€ per month to go to, and group lessons are included so I think it is a pretty good deal. And if you consider taking even 4 classes a month that is only 5€ per class, and at least by Finnish standard that is already pretty cheap. If you on top of that actually also use the gym and go a bit more often on the group lessons, 20€ won’t seem like a lot. 
  2. Some good gym clothes. I don’t like the shoes I use and I definitely do not feel comfortable in the clothes I have usually used for gym. If it is all women exercise class I couldn’t give a f**** but if its mixed or if I am just at a gym I want to feel comfy and look semi put together (I end up looking like a tomato so it isn’t as if I can look amazing, but still. You gotta work with what you have. 
  3. Some good quality “capsule wardrobe” clothes. So clothes that will 100% fit with everything. I really don’t need anything that fancy. Thankfully I don’t have to wear a uniform during work and I have clothes to wear when I need to be a bit more put together. However, I feel I don’t have clothes that would make me feel 100% bomb, even if I would put them on in only 2 minutes. And I want something that simple. A simple white t-shirt with black jeans and some simple accessories, a bit of mascara and out we go. 😉 Simple yet cute. I don’t want it to be the items that cost only 2€ and then I have to buy a new one every week. So I am OK with investing into staple pieces that will last me for years. 
  4. I am cheating a bit, but since I got myself a computer and then I got my phone as a gift I will count them as investments for the next year because mostly it was so that work would be more efficient for me. So I will imagine it counts 😀 
  5. Manicures…maybe. I don’t know how often and if I can find some place that makes them cheap but good, but I really want to get my nails sorted…. they not cute. So I have always had very thing fragile nails and when I put on nail polish (even if it’s not a cheap brand) it will chip off. With all of the base layers and top coats and all. Still, it just won’t stay on. And I hate chipped nail-polish more than anything. Plus maybe if my nails would be protected with a proper gel polish or even acrylic nails, I could grow them long enough to give them a shape… 

Thanks for reading as always. What would you want to invest in next year? Leave a comment down below. 

xoxo Alisa 

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Which mindset should you have? Growth vs Fixed.

Until very recently I’ve felt that if I fail I have no reason to try anymore. I have always been the one to hate being wrong and thus failing felt like the end of the world. Which it, of course, wasn’t.

I am curious to know why I am this way, but at the same time, it doesn’t matter. If I could pinpoint it on being raised a certain way or because my friends are that way or anything else, maybe I’ll just make myself believe that it isn’t my fault and thus I can’t do anything about it. So I might as well accept that I just have been in a fixed mindset state and now I don’t want to be.

I am reading Dr. Carol S. Dweck‘s book Mindset- Changing the way you think to fulfill your potential. It has hit me very very hard. It is unimaginable how much of a fixed mindset person I am. I loathe to admit it but I have only read 38 pages and on almost every page when Dr. Dweck explained the features of a fixed mindset individual I was like “Shit that is exactly like me!?” “And my poor family friends and boyfriend.”

What does it mean if you have a fixed mindset?

  • You believe you can’t amount to anything because you aren’t smart enough
  • Failure defines you.
  • You will have issues in relationships because you feel the need to be correct
  • Other people succeeding will make you feel horrible (thus you will be jealous and bitter etc)

What does it mean to have a growth mindset?

  • You get excited about the challenges
  • You are happy when others succeed
  • You do everything in your power to be better after failing
  • You don’t let challenges get to you.

I love the idea of having a growth mindset. I love love love the idea of being able to improve myself.

Now, why would I even care? Why should I bother?

Because always being right (even when you aren’t but you fight everyone till they say you are right just so you’ll shut up) feels lonely. Feeling bad and negative when others are happy feels bad. Believing you can’t amount to anything because you got a C- on an exams feels like an end of the world sucks. And most importantly isn’t true.

I think it would be exciting to challenge myself more. To know that even if right now I am not that good at writing blogs or math (I suck in math) or well pretty much anything because I have fought to try to improve as if I’d be fighting cancer (Because if I have to improve it means I am a failure) I can still make changes and get better.

Thanks for reading now it is your turn to think and write: Which mindset do you have? How do you plan to change it for the better? Comment down below!

-Alisa

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How I meditate now?

You are not meditating wrong. Unless you aren’t meditating. I want to tell you how I have been able to incorporate meditation into my life. If someone tells you to do something but doesn’t give you a chance to do it your way, you will eventually quit doing it. 

Why should we meditate? 

Meditation has many health benefits and it has been often said to have been a very important contributor to success. Oprah, Angelina Jolie, Tom Bilyeu, Hugh Jackman, and so many others meditate.

What does it do ?

It makes you present, gives you more clarity in your thoughts and gives you the discipline to work hard. Because you have taught yourself to not follow every thought, or if to follow them do so in a controlled manner.

How do I do it?

I have so many things in my head at any given time, esp now with school and work at the same time. I decided there is a way to help this “monkey mind”. I can actually make it less hectic. How? I write my thoughts out in a mind map. You might wonder why is this a better way than the more traditional one… It isn’t. It is just something that works for me. First I get to see all that is going in my head, in a concise package. The point usually of the mind map is to just blurt out things onto paper and find some things that relate to others and sometimes it helps you find solutions.


Photo by 
Lesly Juarez on Unsplash

For me honestly, it isn’t about the solutions. Not in this state. It is to calm and quiet my mind so that once I start work I can concentrate on it. And a good tip is to have a piece of paper with you while you work. If some thought just keeps bugging you, write it down and analyze it later.

Hope you found this idea helpful. I am sure there will be some people who will say that this isn’t meditation. But it calms me, it helps me think more clearly and it makes me stay in the present moment. In my mind that is pretty close to meditation.

As always, thank you for reading. Comment and Follow. My goal is to grow and improve so all constructive criticism is welcome (and compliments too 😀 )

Xoxo

Alisa

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How to change your life: Challenge 5/5

Last but not least: 

Planning is great. But I am willing to bet you plan too damn much! The to-do list doesn’t become done list unless you actually do something.

Now the great thing about to-do lists is that it makes you see what you should do but the bad thing? Well, it makes you feel like you have already achieved things.

This way you will start feeling like you don’t have to actually do things. Just plan everything out; feel good for being so productive and do nothing on that list. Sound familiar? It probably does, at least it does to me.

So what to do? Write out the list. Chose what you are going to do, and put the list away until you have done that task so you don’t even think about the other things. If you aren’t sure what is priority number 1 just start with whichever, this way at least you get some momentum to keep on going.

How to keep a to-do list manageable?  A good idea is 3 by 3. This means write 3 tasks that are pretty big like 1) Write an essay 2) Clean your room 3) Read the book. Now to those tasks write 3 smaller tasks, so they don’t seem so big. With the essay example it would look like this:  1) plan the essay and write the intro 2) write the body and 3) double check and send the essay.  This means you will get 9 smaller tasks for the day that you have to complete. Sometimes you will be able to achieve more than just them sometimes less. And if some of the tasks feel like they are too big even after you have dived them into 3, don’t hesitate to make them even smaller. A step forward is still a step forward no matter how small it is. 

Thank you for reading, I would love to know what you thought of this post and this series; if you missed out on the other ones go check them out here;

How to change your life? Challenge 1/5

How to change your life? Challenge 2/5

How to change your life: Challenge 3/5

Thanks for reading, don’t forget to comment and follow me! I really want to improve my content and write things that help others as much possible so all criticism and compliments help me 😉

xoxo

Alisa

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