Personal development

Confidence ≠ extrovert

I feel like there is a huge misunderstanding about who extroverted people are and who introverted people are and whether or not you can succeed if you are introverted. First of all, yes you definitely have to succeed. And you don’t have to change who you are in order to please others.

I am not going to deny that you need to be able to talk with people if you want success but sometimes being introverted actually helps with that. You are more likely to listen and wait for others to tell you about themselves and speak their mind. This gives you a chance to learn a huge amount of new things and on top of that it will make you very likable because you probably remember better what they said, since you aren’t just waiting to say something in return.

Being confident and being extremely outgoing isn’t a synonym to being confident. There are a lot of people who hide behind being a “clown” and making others just laugh all the time, so they don’t let people too close (This is me quite often, I’m better than I used to be but still). I honestly do think of myself as pretty confident but it is not an over all confidence. I have those areas about me that I know I am strong with and those that really really need help. A lot of it!

But this is to everyone not only to you who are shy and are afraid that you can’t be confident but also for you who are loud and think you have all going for you. Both have work to do. Both of you go and grab some paper and a pencil. And seriously take 30 minutes right now to write what is special and great about you , your skills, your ways of thinking, how you treat others and so on (the answer there is nothing good about me is not acceptable by the way). After you have written and thought about your strengths think of how you can use them to your advantage.

And your strong points don’t actually have to be your future job. Just because you are good in math, doesn’t mean you need to become a mathematician. Maybe you will start a business about something totally different, because you are curious about that other topic and want to learn more, but your math skills help you with the financial aspects. Maybe you are a great communicator but instead of becoming the communication expert at your company you actually start a blog business, etc etc.

Your skills aren’t set in stone, you can hone anything and make it better and stronger and more valuable to those who you want to serve. BUT remembering your unique skills, ways of thinking and so on, will help you build confidence that is a key for success, whether you are the person making everyone laugh, or you are the person asking if someone is OK because you remember them talking about a tough time from last week.

Neither option is a bad one, nor are they as clear cut as I made in this blog post. Anyone who meets me will tell you that I am an extrovert. And I absolutely need the contact with people and I love making others laugh and to talk with people for hours. But I hate parties that are extremely loud, and if I spend a long time with a lot of people I need a day or two to recharge.

As always thanks for reading! Can’t wait to hear from you! And I will leave all of my social media communities linked below!

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